It’s a great question and one that students, friends and colleagues ask me often. There are plenty of days I ask myself [...]]]> This was the subject line in an email I received from a fairly new student of mine – one that had been meditating twice a day for about three weeks.

It’s a great question and one that students, friends and colleagues ask me often. There are plenty of days I ask myself the same thing.  My answer is that for me personally, some days are easier than others and we need to try to accept the present moment as it is – without trying to change it or make it different.

When you’re trying to create a new healthy habit like meditation, the first thing you need to do is accept that every meditation will be different.  This is true for anything we do in our lives.  In whatever we do, we have good days and bad days.  Some days at work our mind just isn’t as focused – we need to accept it without judging it good or bad.  If we play basketball, our timing may be off when we shoot the ball. Other days everything comes very easily – it flows and our shots seem to fall naturally.

Highs and lows are a part of life.  We need to accept them without holding on to the feeling that something isn’t as it should be.   Meditation is the same way -  some days we experience more mental turbulence than others.  As we practice meditating, and let go of trying to control or change things to make it better- over time, we’ll find that those highs and lows even out.   But, we’ll always be practicing.

After all, I call it my meditation “practice”… because I will always be practicing to accept what’s happening right now… as it is.

Peace IN.

-Andy

“Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.  Always work with it, not against it.” – Eckhart Tolle

I think we can all look back and remember some of our favorite teachers over the years.  Chances are, what made them so great is not the subjects that they taught – as much as the way they [...]]]> “It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.” -Einstein  

I think we can all look back and remember some of our favorite teachers over the years.  Chances are, what made them so great is not the subjects that they taught – as much as the way they taught it.

I got to see my college professor (and advisor) Peter Wright, last night after 15 years of being out of college.  Pete knew I was on my own, putting myself through college, and always had a true concern for my well-being.  He also seemed to know when I was “phoning it in” and when to challenge me to work harder.  I think I was probably more surprised that he actually called me out on that stuff.  He would say, “You’re not passing it in like that- are you, ‘Jack’?” (you can make your own guess as to what ‘jack’ was short for).  After seeing Pete last night, I realized that teachers teach who they are – and the reason we like them is because we want to be like them.

It felt great to see his work last night, and to get him to smile.  I don’t think he wanted anything to do with this picture- which is why I like it even more.

The Holidays are a time of joy, love, family, friends… and stress.  Don’t get me wrong, I love the Holiday season – nothing makes me happier than seeing the look on my son’s face when he’s opening his gifts on Christmas.  But… (and it’s a [...]]]> “Plans are useless, but planning is invaluable.” -  Winston Churchill

The Holidays are a time of joy, love, family, friends… and stress.  Don’t get me wrong, I love the Holiday season – nothing makes me happier than seeing the look on my son’s face when he’s opening his gifts on Christmas.  But… (and it’s a big one) between the physical demands of always being on the go – running from one party to another – and the extra emotional energy needed to catch up with family and friends (not to mention socializing with colleagues), the Holidays can be VERY stressful.  Add in some extra cookies, candy canes, caffeine, some Nog, and Cousin Eddie… you’re bound to get some heightened physical and emotional reactions to your stress.

In order to slow things down so we can really enjoy the Holiday season this year we need to start planning now.  Here are five tips that will help you manage your stress levels over the Holiday season.

1. Acceptance

The first tip is acceptance.  It’s the Holidays – there will be stress – accept it.  I know this sounds harsh, but there are just some things that we cannot change so we need to move beyond the fact of thinking that we can.  The sooner you accept this, the easier it will be to deal with the annoyance or irritation of that moment – so you CAN move on.

Take your family for example.  Family is family, so this year don’t try to change them.  You know how hard it is to try to change yourself; don’t expect you can change someone else this season.

Believe me, I know it’s easy for me to say things like, “Let go.. just give up control… and embrace uncertainty”.  And, I know full well you’re probably saying, “Oh, OK, thanks Andy.  I’ll just “accept” my stress -  thanks, that helps.”  However, making the conscious choice not to bottle up your emotions and announce to yourself, “Well, XYZ happened.  I guess I should just deal with it now” will actually lessen the stress level because you’re not pushing the issue back down and fighting it.  Trust me on this one.  Dealing with your stress NOW rather than LATER is key, if you want to have any sort of fun this Holiday season.

2. Planning

Let’s face it, there are going to be a number of Holiday events this season and if you try to attend them all, you’ll wear yourself out quickly.  If you over-commit just to please everyone, this will only lead to more stress all around.  The goal should be able to relax and really enjoy the Holiday season – it goes by so quickly.  Looking back we often wish we could have been more “in the moment.”  So, (with this in mind) it is important to create a master calendar NOW recognizing your limitations – you’ll be able to plan for the essentials and possibly scale back on the (less important) commitments.  The more you plan NOW, the more you will enjoy your time with your friends and family when you are at a social event or party.  Again, this year “accept” that you can’t do it all – and know that it’s okay to say no…politely, of course.

3. Meditate

For thousands of years Vedic Sages, Buddhist Monks and the other great traditions from the East have used meditation as a tool to slow down the mind and its turbulent thoughts and relax the body.  But this doesn’t mean we need to travel to India or some remote mountain in the Himalayas to meditate.  You can actually meditate almost anywhere.  When you start your day with meditation, not only will you be better equipped to cope with stress of the Holidays, you might even unveil a few new perspectives you didn’t have before.  It doesn’t have to occur in the morning – personally, I think it’s a great way to decompress and melt away the accumulated stress after a busy day.  But again, you can do it anywhere.  Try this breathing exercise the next time you are in a long check-out line. 

Waiting Meditation

• Take a deep breath in and pay close attention to your breath (be aware of the people around you – make sure you’re not in the way of anything)

• Every time you notice your mind has wondered, “catch yourself” and bring your attention back to your breath

• Breathe normally when it’s your turn to unload your items from the carriage

You will be amazed at how energized you feel!

4. Yoga/ Exercise

The Holiday season is usually when people give up on fitting in their exercise (and clothes;).  In the North East it gets cold… and dark a lot earlier, so it’s often hard to get motivated to move.  This year, make Thanksgiving the NEW New Year’s day.  This is when we can reflect with gratitude on the prior year and set our intentions and goals for the following year.  Then, get moving!  Soon, you’ll start to forget about “the irritating coworker from last night’s party” and your stress will naturally dissolve – you will actually feel a boost in your energy and mood.  This is also the best time of the year to hit the gym because it’s less crowded.  You’ll have your routine locked down before the “quitters”;) come back in January.

Yoga and Exercise are like “meditation in motion” because you’re focusing on a single task and more concerned with your physical movement – concentrating on how your body is feeling.  Take a few classes a week, your body will thank you later.

5. Sleep

The last tip is sleep.  Lots of late nights and a lack of sleep can contribute to experiencing even greater stress.  Sleep is essential for balance and renewal, especially during the Holidays when we are constantly expending energy with friends and family members… and running from one crowded store to the next.  How can you wake up refreshed throughout the season? Try this:

• Set and get into a routine

• Go to bed and wake up the same time every day (weekends included)

• Use the bedroom for sleeping – No TV, cell phones, or working on the laptop once you crawl into bed (this goes double for my wife;)

• No caffeine and limit your alcohol before you go to bed

I hope this helps you have a restful and wonderful Holiday season – and say “hello everybody” to Aunt Bethany for me!

Peace IN!

I hope you enjoy this free guided meditation that I created for you to help you stay centered in this turbulent time.  A Breath Awareness Meditation is one of the quickest ways to ground and center yourself.  Watching the breath in a meditation practice can [...]]]> “Smile, breathe and go slowly.”  – Thich Nhat Hanh

I hope you enjoy this free guided meditation that I created for you to help you stay centered in this turbulent time.  A Breath Awareness Meditation is one of the quickest ways to ground and center yourself.  Watching the breath in a meditation practice can help your mind let go of its often chaotic and turbulent thoughts.  The breath will fill you with invigorating energy and inspiration to be in this world, but not caught up in the drama around you.  I hope this helps!

Guided Meditation “Breathe” (10 min audio)

(MP3 download) Right click and “save link as…”  to download it to your computer